butterflydream .◦°◦˚

Jimmies is a place that nothing, no school, nobody can replace. It’s a very special part of my life, and I am so grateful to have been there.

I attended the Annual school dinner last night, and it was amazing to see everyone. Everytime I go, I just feel the warmth of the place, and how much I miss it. It’s really sad that many have left, but it’s also good to know, that they’ll always come back.

Things will never leave you if you remember, right? That’s what I truly believe now. Sometimes, I feel that things are going to leave, and I become very afraid of that, but then, I just have to remember, that we won’t ever be at the same place, but as long as we have been a part of something good, then it’s with us forever.

It was really great to catch up with friends, teachers, parents, everyone. I had the best time, and I will always go there each year, no matter who is there. I can imagine myself coming back in 60 years time saying how I graduated in 2005.

OMG! This is just absoutely so sad that I completed deserted my poor old blog!

Well, I finally do have something really exciting to post about!

YAY! I met Sue! OMG! Okay, let me be a little more specific. I first found her site when I heard her song “Please don’t believe me”, which I completely loved. She wrote back and was really nice, and also I added her on myspace!

So, a few years later, we met in Brissie!

She came for a visit because she won a trip singing “Over the rainbow”, and we met in the Queen St Mall! It was so fun, we took heaps of photos and I’m sure she realised by now that I am very photo-obsessed! Haha!

We were talking about how we have crazy friends on myspace from the same city but never meet them but if from another country, then yeah! Also, we talked about different accents, being a singer/songwriter and how songs are recorded, that it was very easy to muck up the lyrics…

Also, this was just so awesome I gotta write, Sue was saying how she did some voice overs on the phone, those messages that say ‘press 1 for ____ option, please wait until ___’, once she called up and was like *pressed one* ‘Thanks, me!’. LOL!!

OMG I just gotta say how much fun we had, we were so hyper and giggly, and we didn’t even have red cordial!

Yay, Arabella is here for a few days!!

She came last night, and I just had to write this hilarious thing that happened. That night, she got back and we had sushi for dinner. Since she already ate in the city, she just took one of them to try.

Arabella got a piece and put it to her mouth, saying “Your mum made this, didn’t she?”, and I replied with “No, she took it from the bins!” ROFLMAO, that expression on Arabella was so hilarious, like “……” *jawdrops* “WHAT?!?!!” HAHAHA!

Last night, we watched a bit of 102 Dalmatians and it’s so funny seeing Cruella DeVil get made into a giant cake!

OMG and I am absolutely so excited about this but I FINALLY unlocked this secret level in Yoshi’s Island cos I managed to get 100 points for them! LOL! I also got Arabella to play the first level and it’s so cute, she’s like “OH MY BABY!!! MY BABYYY COME BACKK!!” When the baby fell off. It’s just adorable!

A chat I had with Steve about Digimon.

Susanna: omg it must be so awesome for your boys to be watching digimon, and seeing YOU on it!!

Steve:  Yeah, it’s fun. Tyler, my 5 year old, turns to me and says “The emporer is NOT a nice man, daddy”.

Susanna: Awww, that is so cute! Does he know that you voiced him? I can’t wait till they see when the emporer turns good!

Susanna: OMG, there’s a question i’ve always wanted to ask, but keep forgetting, if you remember that digimon interview thing you did a while back, you said the most memorable moment is that scene when the emperoer lost his armor and has a break down, that must have been really hard cos it takes REALLY GREAT acting, how did you do it?

Steve:  If I remember correctly, I just capitalized on the angst I had from when my grandma had died. It was a couple years prior to that, but I think that, combined with me really getting into the role, it’s almost like I had Ken inside me. Like I WAS him. I know that sounds kinda scary-like Stanislavski-but it worked.

Aww, I saw lil Zara and Jacob today! Their parents was going to the first parent and teacher evening, so we went to babysit them! It is just such a great experience.

When we came, Zara was just smiling and waving, they were both drawing. I love their interpretation of glasses. They are so cute and talented little drawers. Soon, they went upstairs to brush their teeth. OMG it was so adorable what Zara said, she was like “the toilet bumped my skin!” aww! LOL!

As their parents were leaving, I got a really cute huggle from Zara! And soon, Jacob too. They happily waved goodbyes.

They were reading some books, and afterwards we went downstairs again. They both wanted to know what was in my bag, so I opened it up and showed it to them. They were so absoutely curious, and saying “What’s that? What’s that for?” and asking about everything. Just adorable. They found my camera and Zara was taking so many photos all by herself! She took one of me and Jacob, and then she posed with a huge smile.

When it was 7:30pm, it was their bedtime. Being kids, they didn’t want to go to sleep, and wanted to play. We said how when the click hits the 30, it was their bedtime. Then Zara said the cutest thing. “When it’s this time in the morning, we wake up!” HAHAHA! Meaning, she was hoping that it was the morning so she can wake up instead of going to sleep! LOL!

We read them some stories, and they soon went to sleep!

OMGOMGOMGOMG! TWINNY Karibear! *Huggles karitwin soooo much*

THANK YOU SO MUCH for the BOX!!! I love it so very much! I have been looking at the things all afternoon! I can’t express just how much I appreciate Twinny putting all this effort, time and love into such beautiful and priceless gifts! I just LOVE THEM!

Aww, I told Twinny this in email, but it’s just so hilarious. There was a candle that’s wrapped in soft paper, that looked a little like toilet paper, and I remembered Twinny and I having a conversation on Msn once that we should send each other funny presents, such as a fork ROFL! My first thought was, “Ooooh, Twinny sent me a roll of toilet paper!” HAHAHA!

I absoutely LOVE the CDs so much! Wow, especially how beautiful she made the covers, with colours and text, as well as what each songs are in the CDs. I love them so much! I love the Kari’s Collection Album 1 and 2, as well as Digimon the Movie Soundtrack, Lion King sidetrack, Return to Pride Rock, Nick Lachey, and all the amazing Laura Pausini CDs. I cannot wait to get started in listening to those songs, I’m gonna love them!

OMG Twinny is just so absoutely talented! She made a beautiful Patamon for hanging in the windows, it’s funny how we think so alike, cos I also sent her a gift of something to put on the windows too! I love it! It’s sitting happily on my window!

I absoutely love the cute little pieces of writing that twinny wrote everywhere in those gifts! Especially where I don’t expect it! I’d open a box, and see a message, and I’d squee! I just love reading things that Twinny writes! I absoutely LOVE doing the word search, the words are just amazing, but I still haven’t found ‘Yang’ yet! ROFL! I will very soon, I’m sure! I really love the cards, the drawings that Twinny did. They are so precious!

Wow, OMG! The top, I can’t say how much I love it! It really fits me well and I love to wear it thinking about my Twinsis! I really love the colour, and the little cute characters on the top! I love the elephant, and it’s so sweet of Twinny to remember our conversation about me wanting a pet elephant! I really love fan, the keyring from Italy, the movie 13 Going on 30, and that cute box with all the beautiful seashells and stones.

Twinny, you are an angel. The things you do for me are priceless. I simply cannot wait to plan her next big surprise!

Sometimes, the best feeling is having done something to help someone. That is a true happiness that nobody can give you, but yourself. This feeling is truly priceless. Even better, is when you are sacrificing something you like doing to help that person or if doing what you are asked isn’t something you particularly like doing. If you can overcome that negative feeling at first, because it isn’t something you like doing, afterwards, the joy and proudness of having accomplished what you did is so much greater.

I am so thankful! Not just because I can talk to someone, but I also feel understood. Not a lot of people can truly understand, but one person can. I guess sometimes, situations and events happen and when we try to make sense of it, but failing to, we make up the reasons. We think a certain way, so that we can tell ourselves, this happened. But when we things happen, this old familar feeling comes back. That’s when we feel all this time spent building that sweet story has now faded, and we’ve hit reality.

Haven’t we all heard of things that terrified us in some ways? Why do we seem to fear things that we don’t even understand ourselves? Why do we have those type of fears that don’t seem to leave us alone? I guess we just want to be safe, to be with people we desire to. Reflecting to my own fears and worries, I do believe that past events lead to it. If it wasn’t for something bad happening in the past, we wouldn’t really feel it as intense.

I’ve had my own share of experiences that doesn’t make things easy at times. There are days when my mind completely gets taken over by fears, or it feels that way. There are times when I want to despirately control it, but can’t. What would you do in that situation? There is no real solution that takes it all away. But with a little understanding and support, we can truly break it down and not allow it to take over. I am a lucky person, because I have met that one person who has proven to me patience and understanding can take most of it away.

It’s so important to know that perfection isn’t something we can achieve at once, perhaps even in lifetimes, but we can still strive for it. We may feel really down, frustrated or upset with ourselves when we can’t get there, but we also never stop getting better if we allow ourselves to be. That is one of the most valuable lessons I’ve learnt and will always remind myself of.

I finally mailed Karitwin’s box to the post bank. I just absoutely adore the word Post Bank! I can’t wait till it arrives.

Speaking of twinny, I want to mention a really cute word we misspelt but ever since then, we love using it in our long goodbyes in our msn chats, and that is beeee. I wish twinny good luck in her theatre performance!

Karitwin, if you are reading this, soon you’ll be able to watch _i____ T____ and _____, and remember _Z and put a ____ on your window and huggle the _____, with lots of _____ to r___ and st____ to stick! Rofl! If this is hard to understand, then my evil plans have worked! Muahaha, I’ve totally confuzzled you!

10. Mandarin is a tonal language.

If you say “hua hua” with a rising tone, it means “slippery”.  If you say it with a flat high tone, it means “licentious” or “womanizing”.  If you saying with a descending tone, it means “drawing”.

If you are tone deaf, congratulations!  You are going to make a lot of Chinese people laugh.

Situation: A street vendor has asked you if you wish to buy a tiger claw (for medicinal purposes).
You meant to say: “不要.  Bu yao (descending tone).  I don’t want it.”
You have actually said: “不咬.  Bu yao (dipping tone).  Please don’t bite me!”

9. It is very hard for foreigners to memorize proper nouns.

If I tell you my name is Max, all kinds of neurons fire.  Maybe you think of a dog named Max.  Maybe you call me Maximus and you picture me in the gladiator arena.  Maybe you just fixate on that sexy “x” in my name.  Or maybe you picture me in M.C. Hammer pants “taking it to the max”.  Which, of course, I do on a daily basis.

If I tell you my name is Li Feng, no such images are elicited.  Not a damn one.  To you it’s just a random string of letters.  Without those silly, fleeting associations to serve as subconscious cement, no memory is formed.

Situation: You run into me on the street after just having met me.
You meant to say: “立丰，你好.  Li Feng, ni hao.  Hello Li Feng.”
You have actually said: “Um….. 凤梨，你好.  Feng Li, ni hao.  Hello Pineapple.”

8. You will be tempted to translate directly from English and it won’t work.

高 means “high”.
潮 means “tide”.
So 高潮 means “high tide”, doesn’t it?

Nope, it means “orgasm”.  I found this out the hard way when I asked someone about surfing during high tide.

7. Hangman becomes a *lot* more difficult.

6. The bad dictionaries are worthless.

My electronic dictionary translates 发紫 as “empurple”, 更改 as “rejigger”, 品尝 as “degustation”, and 荡漾 as “popple”.  Which are really fancy ways of saying “to turn purple”, “to update”, “to try (food)”, and “to ripple”, respectively.

Who in Sam Hill wrote this?  Clearly someone who is more intimate with the Oxford Dictionary of Pompous Twaddle than he is with actual English-speaking human beings.

Thanks a lot pal.  I’ll rejigger you til your degustation popples.

5. The good dictionaries are worthless too.

Look up 蛋 and you’ll see that it means “egg”.  Simple enough.

But it’s wrong, wrong, wrong.  蛋 actually means “a sizable, oblong egg with a hard shell”.  Try asking where you can buy fish蛋.  Chinese people will imagine that a sizable, oblong egg with a hard shell has come tumbling out of the fish’s cloaca.  Then they’ll laugh at your ignorance of basic aquatic reproduction.

Certainly don’t use 蛋 to describe human eggs.

4. Chinese typos totally alter the meaning of the sentence.

Chocolate.  Chocolat.  Chocklit.  Chokomut.  Whatever.  They all mean the same thing.

Chinese is typed by punching in the romanization of the character.  Then you get a little menu to pick from a few dozen homonyms, prioritized by an autosuggest program that looks at context. 

I was IMing a friend once, inattentively letting the autosuggest do its thing.

I meant to send: “你有没有申请圣地亚哥的大学?  Did you apply to any universities in San Diego?”
Two mistyped tonal numbers resulted in: “你有没有深情圣地压歌的大学?  Do you have deep feelings for the Holy Land’s university of squashed music?”

3. Idioms Gone Wild

Chinese is full of idioms that don’t make sense when read literally.  Think of the English idiom “shooting fish in a barrel”.  You know what “shoot”, “fish”, and “barrel” mean, but you still don’t see how making fun of Eggbert the Class Nerd is like shooting fish in a barrel.

马屁精means “brown-noser”, but character for character it could mean “essence of horse butt”.  Wow!  Is that by Calvin Klein?

So don’t get discouraged.  The Eastern Mountain will rise again.

2. The Chinese language reflects a difference in thought, not just a difference in expression.

I spent forever trying to translate “the scientific method” into Chinese before it hit me that maybe China doesn’t teach it.  We don’t have a word in English for the acupunctural practice of putting suction cups on people’s backs to draw out the bad energy.  Why should Chinese have special vocabulary to describe the 17th century works of Francis Bacon?

Kleenex is also hard to translate because the same word is used for both facial tissue and toilet paper.  The word for “toast” refers to sliced bread whether it is toasted or not.

It works the other way too.  For example, 看破红尘 is a simple four-word phrase that can’t be translated succinctly.  Roughly, it means “to see through the vanity of life and become disillusioned with the mortal world”.

1. You guessed it: it’s the writing system!  The number 1 reason why Mandarin will kick your ass is that it has 6500 pissed-off, knuckle-dusting characters in common use.

Treasures: 2007-2008

Treasures are positive things that strike my fancy, that make me feel happy or thankful or interested. Treasures are memories encapsulated in just a few words that are worth remembering. These are my Treasures for the past year.

♥ this year ♥

♥ Recording and putting together Radiomon
♥ Christmas Holidays
♥ Dreams that always makes me smile in the mornings
♥ Heavy rain
♥ Marth 8th, 2007. 3:56pm
♥ First boyfriend
♥ Finding so many features on Messenger Plus
♥ Taking photos
♥ Saying I love you for the first time
♥ 12-2pm 
♥ Thinking about some fo the happiest times of my life
♥ Mom’s emails
♥ Saying over and over how much I love that person
♥ Weekends 8-10pm
♥ Visiting grandparnets in China, May 2007
♥ Home with kids
♥ Legend of Heaven and Earth- The Mermaid
♥ Shops in China
♥ Writing a thankyou email to Bernie and Sam
♥ St James Dinner
♥ Delta Goodrem’s new album
♥ Lygia’s emails
♥ Seeing The Veronicas live and getting their autograph
♥ December 25-30th
♥ Finally remembering to eat those buns in the freezer
♥ Chinese Paladin
♥ A song called Day Fragrance
♥ Digimon
♥ Twinny and I getting matching msn name together 
♥ First hug and kiss
♥ Playing the Digimon World: Dawn game on DS

time was yours and mine while we were wild and free

Why do we feel? What is the reasons for us to feel happy, sad, angry, excited, frustrated, or nervous? I have been thinking about this for such a long time, and my thoughts are beginning to make more sense. Why do we seem to know which emotions make us feel good, that we want to keep it, or which makes us feel bad, that we don’t want to feel it anymore? It seems like a mystery, maybe our natural way of surviving.

It seems that naturally, we just love the feeling of laughing. I also believe that feelings don’t just come for the sake of it, it’s here to give us a message. A message that says, this is good, keep going, or stay away and think about it.

It makes sense when we lose someone, or when someone treats us badly, that we’d feel bad about it, because I truly think, it’s our protective ways of saying to us this is a bad situation, do something about it. Why else would some of it go away when we talked about it, or if we got help? When we have to leave someone close to us, we feel it. The closer they are, the more you can feel it. It could be our way of saying I want them to stay. It won’t always work as we live in a world separated by distance.  

I always think about it the same way I look at being tired, or hunger. I have done a 40 hour famine once, and it was not to eat anything for 40 hours. The first few hours was difficult. You could feel the hunger pain coming and all you want to do is eat. That lasted for a while, but the second day, I no longer felt it anymore. Because we weren’t getting food anyways, maybe the signals for hunger stopped, as it wasn’t working.

I believe the pain of leaving is the same, we are made to feel it, maybe as a message for us to be with the person again. But after a while, we feel less and less, perhaps it’s because right this moment, we can’t do anything about it.

I love to encourage everyone to look at how they feel as a signal message. If we feel a certain way, we shouldn’t try to get rid of it or feel that we are silly for feeling that way. We are made this way, and we are all to some levels, very similar.

HAHA this is so funny I just had to share.

So, what would you call Myspace and Facebook combined?

My dad was talking about internet programs like Myspace and Facebook, and he didn’t remember the names, so he called it Myface.

The way he said it was so hilarious, “What is it called, Myface?!” I absoutely love that name! It just so refreshing!!

It’s funny, when I’m feeling happy, I just want to share it with the world! But I just love isharing that wonderful feeling all around. Sometimes, it’s strange that happiness just comes in the most powerful ways, and it can be the simplest things that makes the difference. Dreams always inspire me when they bring images to life. Like a faded memory glowing with colours once agian.

I’m also happy because I feel lucky! Very and extremely lucky! I’m just going to ramble for the next hour about how lucky I am, because I really really am! I can’t believe it, I am so grateful for the life I am living now, because I always wake up with something to look forward to, someone to love, as well as talking to the kindest and most amazing person, I get to visit websites, play games and just love what comes in a day. I have amazing times to remember and days to look forward to.

I’m so bouncy right now!! *Muahaha* My evil self is SHOWING!! I’m planning a SURPRISEEE for someone with a a _id_o! HA HA HA HA It has been fun and eggciting making that thing and it’s acutally DONE! OH NO! How can I wait for TWO WHOLE MONTHS  (maybe if I’m lucky, one month) before I can display that lovely piece of thing!!! Everyone that knows me would know that I can’t keep a secret *only the eggciting ones, of course* with my LIFE and how IMPATIENT I CAN GET with surprises!!!! *giggles* *dances like crazy* LOL just having a hyper moment here! Don’t mind me! I can bounce outer space right now!! I’m a HAPPY HAPPY GIRL!! In a HAPPY HAPPY WORLD! ROFL! Making this makes me sooooooo happppy!! =]

These are the best days of my life

Dreams have always given me a glimpse of my hopes. In some ways, it made reality seems to good to be true. Every minute of this time, no matter how short, was filled with eternal sunlight.  There was so much happiness, love and laughter. Excitement and happiness reflected in our smiles, our eyes. The type of peace and love that not only fills your heart with happy memories, but it is a journey that travels to the road to heaven.

When life is filled with energy given by that one person you trust and love forever. It’s the feeling of completeness, when one hand fits into the other person’s like two pieces of puzzle that are destined to come together. I have reached heaven’s door and seen the horizons. I have touched the rainbows, tasted the sunshine and felt the raindrops on my skin. I know now, that I have truly lived.

In this life, I have searched for that one fingerprint that I recognised straight away, and I have found it. In the fated crossroads, I have witnessed a miracle being born. This must have been planned, because it feels so right. I believe in the world’s magic, and I have been the lucky one.

Spending one minute with the person you truly love is so fulfilling and beautiful. It’s a neverending happiness that gives life the spark of colour. It’s so much learning. Growing. Living. Loving. Learning to express ourselves with appreciation and love, growing together and individually, living a dream and loving unconditionally. This is the sign of eternal life, a place where love never dies.

The words, love, actions and feelings have become a part of me. If I didn’t open my eyes, I could see every dream in colour. As time was nearing the end for that moment, it was still beautiful, I can just see into the future now, these moments are shared. It is forever. This time has taught me the power of believing. It showed me hope, the neverending destiny that has traveled by my side. For yesterday’s laughs, today’s hope and tomorrow’s future, these are the best days of my life.

A reflection of the best days that ends 2007. ♥♥

Legend of the Swordsman & Fairy, or Chinese Paladin is one of those meaningful shows that I just really loved from the first moment I saw it! I was searching on youtube and came across a Xiao Yao & Ling’er music video, I loved the scenes that were on it, it just seemed to really appeal to me straight away, so decided to find the show. It truly is an outstanding series.

This show is adapted from a Chinese RPG game. It is wuxia themed and very much fantasy, action, love, tragedy and comedy combined. It’s one of the shows that really teach you something important. Many events and people end in tragedy or not what you expected, but I always felt that the show has taught me something I should value, such as life and love.

One of the things I really love about the story is characters. Sometimes, you could just love and feel for them, other times, you think ‘OMG! WHY DID HE DO THAT?!!!”, they go through big changes, and grow a lot.

I would have to say, that Rue Ru is my favourite character in the series. Despite that at the beginning, she was quite obnoxious, and acting very spoilt, she is acutally the kindest person inside. She really shows that when Xiao Yao was looking for Ling’er, even though she loved him, she was more determined to help him for who he loved. Even when Ling’er was found, she continued to support them. Sometimes, that can be the hardest thing to do if you love that person, is being happy that they’re with someone else. Even when Ling’er left Xiao Yao, she wanted to help him. When he got back with Ling’er, she accepted. Yue Ru simply said “I just wanted him to be happy. If he’s happy, so am I”, despite that someone else makes him happy. I love that about Yue Ru.

I guess in some ways, Ling’er is the same. I admire both female characters. I really find it that Ling’er would’ve taken a lot of courage to push the one she loves to someone else.

Another character I particularly admire is Number 7. In the scene when he was taken by the fox demon, instead of wanting to kill her, he really felt for her loss, that her husband was killed by humans. He wanted to help the fox demon bring her husband back. He also said some of the best quotes in the series.

Quotes from the Series:

“Misunderstandings often happen because you think you understand.”

“Rather than love each other, you should try to understand each other.”

“Instead of stubbornly love from afar, you should wish the other happiness. Don’t let the person you love be worn down by your love.  Instead, your love should give him the strength to spread his wings and soar.”

“If you two are truly fated, even if you live in separate worlds, your hearts will still be together.”

“To truly love someone, his happiness will be your happiness.”

“The fire burning in my heart attracted me towards you. Each of us burning, together. There was no longer “you” or “me”. We become soaring birds, always in pairs, flying together. Flying over the rugged mountains, jumping over the wide rivers. We returned to the beginning of time and went to edge of the world. We kept flying, and flying, without ever feeling tired. We both knew this is the instead of undying love, our eternal mark.”

Chinese Paladin starts off, as Xiao Yao being a ’stinkin’ punk’ (the translations say) LOL, lazing around and suddenly, his aunt gets seriously ill after some suspicious people come to their inn. They told him to go to this Divine Island that has a medicine that cures all diseases. Unfortuately, it was a trick, so that they can get into that Island to get Ling’er, the Princess of Nan Zhao, because the head priest was evil and wanted to destroy the world. Ling’er was a thread to him and his people.Ling’er at that time, didn’t know who she was, nor did she know that she was a NuWa Descendant. She was just a young girl that loved life. When Xiao Yao came for the medicine, Ling’er claims she had met him 10 years ago. That she had been waiting for him to come back. The story continues then, when Ling’er and Xiao  Yao gets married, then the Luna Sect, evil people kills Linger’s grandma, and Xiao Yao loses his memory, but still promises to take Ling’er back to Nan Zhao.

While going, Xiao Yao and Ling’er runs into Number 7, and Yue Ru. Ling’er suddenly realises she is growing a snake’s tail, and runs away scared. Xiao  Yao is threatened by Yue Ru’s father to marry Yue Ru, because he won the ‘battle’ which determines who Yue Ru was going to marry. Yue Ru refuses and runs away from home, helping Xiao Yao looking for Ling’er. When they finally found Ling’er, she became cold and distant towards Xiao Yao because Ling’er did not want her being a NuWa Decendant to burden him. She decided the best way is to break up with him.

I won’t go anymore into the story, because it gets quite complicated from there. The ending is very sad, because most of the good people died. But I felt that there is something gained out of those sad endings. Even when it’s the saddest part of the show, there are still lessons to learn.

I really love Ah Nu and Tang Yu as a couple, Ah Nu is always this playful girl who loves to eat, and really doesn’t care about anything else. It’s so awesome to see her go through changes, and it was amazing when her pendant and Tang Yu’s fitted when they kissed, and their love and sacrifice saved the world. It’s just beautiful. They then turned into birds. I love the story about the Connection Thread too, that it connects hearts. I love the saying “Tian ya hai jiao” the end of the sky and edge of the cliff is really in your heart if you believe. That they would sacrifice themselves to bring love and peace to the world.

Wo ai ni, hai ku shi lan, shi zhi bu yi. [I love you, till the rocks crumble and oceans run dry]

I had my dear ol’ friend, Kayleen come and visit today! OMG We have to see each other more often cos the last time I saw her was about six months ago! She came around midday and we talked a bit, like how we are going. Stuff. Holidays and work, Christmas and New Year, as well as everything we could think of. It soon started pour with rain, then we had a really nice storm. 

One part was hilarious, when we were choosing DVDs for Kay to borrow, we also decided we were going to watch a movie. Sadly, I have about 150 DVDs I bought from China that has not been watched. HAHAHA! Including “Happy Feet”. The funnier thing was, we decided to watch “Because I Said So”, and when I was opening the case, I was like “Oh, wouldn’t it be terrible if I opened this and there was no DVD in there?”, Kayleen was like “YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT”, well, there was a DVD there. Thankfully! I almost drove her insane by saying “Oh, its great the DVD is in there, but it would be worse if it was broken”. You can just imagine the look on her face at this point. ROFL!

We saw a movie and she had to go home early, but it was REALLY FUN! We decided that we’d meet up again in 2 weeks time, so hopefully it will work out. It was a really fun day and I can’t wait till two week’s time when we meet up again.

What can you do, when you try to understand, and realise the one way that can be done is in little steps? I guess you can only take one step each day. There are endless dreams that seem to be so far away, yet so close in my reach at the same time. Are the dreams and hope for our future  makes life so worthwhile? Could it be, that our desire to be with other people inspire us to be even better and happier? Could angels walk beside us?

I wish there was a definite answer to us, as people. Sometimes, I wonder what we’re doing here, are we creating our own realities? In a way, I want to know what’s coming, but then, I think I would rather not know, and be surprised. 

When you look at memories, can it be possible the negatives and back lucks around, so that we see hope? Yes. It takes time to think and believe it. The things we remember can makes us feel good or bad. Sometimes, little things mean so much more. It’s also the little things that we can  miss so much. To have felt it, experienced it, and am growing from it, I have no doubts in destiny. I owe that so much.

I’m understood. I don’t know how or why. I’m lucky, and there are no questions about that. I feel the puzzle that used to be for life is fitting in together. I can almost see the picture, not as a picture, but as a promise. It holds all of my hopes, fears, dreams, inspiration, happiness, and the good and bad. It is something I am proud of, and something I look forward to.

What about the way? What leads us? Are we always walking in the dark or is there a light that helps? What about being lost and alone, is there a way for us to get out of the darkness? What if we can’t control how we feel and goes down a direction, perhaps not the one we want? I’ve been there myself, but I also know that being able to express that, no matter how helpless you feel, is courage. It’s not easy, but it helps.

Sometimes, I would love to know the answer to life. Maybe I do, maybe I’ve known the answers, but needed a little reminder. That reminder is my guardian and angel. That reminder is more than a friend, love, and all that exceeds life itself. It’s the pure essence of love. The presence is there, and it’s enough. I know this angel won’t ever leave, because it is a part of me.

♥ DESTINY TWINS ♥
[a part of me will always be with you]

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I never knew miracles could happen until now. I never guessed that I’d meet someone who would become a guardian angel as well as my twin sister. I never knew what could be possible and what couldn’t, and now I believe anything is possible. All I can say is somebody is watching. I really do believe that Kari and I met because of destiny. So many times we have finished each other’s sentence, and now something even more.

Sometimes we’d often stay up late on msn and chat about what we think. We come up with ideas, maybe we were the same person in our past life. Maybe we were twin sisters then, and now we are meant to know each other again. We don’t know if that’s true, but all we do believe in is destiny.

Kari and I first met each other a while ago and we talked lots but it was a special show that brought us very close together.

Incase you are wondering, Kari and I are not biological sisters or twins, but our events, lives, emotions are connected. It’s simply amazing. I can’t explain it, we live in different parts of the world but we can literally feel each other’s happiness or pain. It’s something I never believed could be true, but now I believe it. Both Kari and I believe it.

All we know is that we’re linked and that is a very special thing. I could never repay what destiny has done. I will always be grateful and happy that I’ve met my true angel from above.

“You’re an angel as well as the best twin sis I could ever ask for, I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

-xxx-
Sus aka Xiao Cui & Kari aka Mei Lin